1. Before you do anything at all, the first step is to get clear about what you want and need and the reasons why. You can use the guidelines I work to when planning my well formed outcomes. It doesn’t matter even if it is something seemingly small, it’s worth getting clear before you approach anyone about the matter. It gives you confidence, clarity and calm.

2. The next step is to remind yourself that the person you are about to talk to or write to is also a human being. They have stuff going on in their lives too. It might not be the same as what we are experiencing as parents of children with special needs but as humans there are so many challenges we could face at any one time. Take a step back and take stock of the situation before charging in with what you want and need.

The main aim is to achieve the best outcome for your child, not to get into a heated discussion or argument with the professional who’s help you need. You want them on your side to help you advocate. Building a positive relationship is the way forward.

3. Make ‘friends’ with this person. I have met so many parents through my groups, workshops and 1:1 sessions who have at least one professional who they really don’t like. That person who always seems to get in the way and prevent progress. Sometimes it’s the Educational Psychologist or the Paediatrician or even their teacher. Most often, with some effort and by being prepared to swallow your pride a little, these relationships can be turned around. You don’t have to be best friends with these people, celebrating their birthdays or sending Christmas cards but it can become positive. Remember, the aim it to get them to understand you and your family and the needs of your child. By doing this and creating a rapport through asking for their help, advice and expertise, you have a good shot and getting them to buy into your family story and backing you to make a difference.

What to do next…

This topic is part of the Getting Yourself Heard, Become A Velvet Bulldozer Workshop. The next live event is going to be held in Leamington Spa on February 28th. Here is a link to booking your ticket.

If you can’t join me on a live workshop (click here to learn more about, What Is a Live Workshop) you will very soon be able to take part on-line. My on-line learning course – Getting Your Voice Heard, is almost ready for launch. To stay up to date, drop me a line, like my facebook page and sign up for my  Mentoring Newsletter

You can also join my Facebook community of SEN Parents for regular mentoring and support. Search for CEO of My Special Needs Family and request to join.S


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